Moose Poop and Gummies
I was eating gummies with my face in moose poop. Well, to be fair I didn't notice the moose droppings until my vision started to reopen. The past few miles had been pretty close to the shittiest I've ever traveled, and I could not read the writing until almost too late.
Meet Adam 4 miles into the run, then meet Adam 14 miles later.
June 20th, my day off. The weather apps all agreed it would be a beautiful day. My shin bone was still pretty sore from a slip I took in a boulder field two days before, but I couldn't pass up a nice day off.
I took off with a smile on my face, little did I know the wreck I would return. I passed by a large group of hikers ready to tackle the same trail as I. The Continental Divide Trail, although it goes by many names: Knight Ridge where I started and I think Ranger Trail where I looped back towards camp.
My climb up Knight Ridge was familiar ground but still gorgeous. I hit the overlook three and a half miles in where I turned back last time. I continued on cutting inland from Lake Granby to catch the Colorado River up to the north. I dropped off the ridge into a smallish valley that looked like a warzone. The Pine Beetle had really done its damage through this area. Luckily the trail had been chain sawed so I wasn't hopping across downed trees for the next few miles. I came to a boarded up US owned cabin as I got my first glimpse of the river. Well, I think it's technically the river at this point although I wouldn't want to try and split where river officially becomes lake.
Shortly beyond I hit a sign that claimed to welcome me to Rocky Mountain National Park. All the 'do this, don't do' reminded me of that long haired freaky people song.
So as with most things with me I had no clear cut goal, or turn around point, on this out and back. I had 2 places it'd be nice to reach, but nothing in stone. One place was Green Ridge Campground. I could fill up my water here for the return trip... oh the return trip I didn't know I was in for. The other was a trailhead between Shadow Mountain Reservoir and Grand Lake.
If I were to turn around early I would want it to be a significant landmark that I wouldn't forget. Also I just like putting arbitrary rules on turning around to help make it more difficult to Columbus out. That dude has been celebrated for far too long. He set out for the Indies and turned around at America. If you sent me to the store for spices and I came back saying i had met some new friends, you should reply 'Cool! But where are my spices?' So instead of saying wuss out or calling myself a pansy, I'm calling it Columbussing.
I hit Columbine creek and thought this to be a significant place to turn around. I found a strange tin cylinder, possibly a well. At 8.5 miles it was a little short, and I thought I was getting close to Green Ridge Campground. I decided to run another 5-10 minutes and check my progress on my GPS trail app. From there I could make an informed decision on turning around or making it to the camp.
In this 10 minutes I met a couple that hikes a lot of spends the summers in Grand Lake, the town, not the actual lake. They said it was another 2-2½ miles to the Shadow Mountain Dam, which is right next to the campground. This buoyed me on, also they told me of a spot that they always see wildlife. I had run right through it, but I would be sure to check for some creatures on my return trip... oh the retur- I won't do that again.
I made it to the camp, and found a spigot to fill my water. I almost skipped doing this as I should have enough water for the return trip... this is something I almost always trick myself into, and I almost never learn.
Never pass up water.
Never skip nutrition because I feel good.
Never travel without a raincoat.
That last one is a new one I'm adding, because it may have saved my life on this trip, along with the not passing by a water spigot. I did, however, skip the nutrition that led to the great story I am slowly getting to.
I never saw that couple again, but being an out and back I kind of expected to. They must've snuck out while I was messing around at the camp and dam. I did however run into 4 people who were out on a pontoon boat, had run it on a sand bar and were relaxing in the sun drinking beverages. I wandered down to the water to let them know that they were living the life!
Me after meeting the Pontoon People.
I checked off the landmarked I had passed earlier that morning and came to the marshy area the couple suggested I look for wildlife. I saw none, although I did hear a creature breaking branches as he scampered away at my presence. This however was the warzone area I mentioned before. It was now 2:00 in the afternoon, on a semi cloudless day. I was baking without the tree cover, so I assume all the smarter-than-I animals were under cover waiting out the hot sun.
It was around this time my day was five bombing... fast! The hills were crushing, and my chest felt tight. I took a gel pack and sucked down some water. Maybe I felt slightly better, but down in this valley i just baked. I remember dubbing it the Valley of the Shadow of Death because of all the downed trees. As I created the ridge separating me from Lake Granby I was welcomed with a big cool guest of wind. I literally said, 'Thank you Wind God.'
Now on top of the ridge I was blessed with some runnable flats and downs. I had an arbitrary time I wanted to finish in so i was taking advantage. This section goes from the ridge, to lake level, back up the ridge, then down to the campground. These next uphills I hit, no matter how small, were absolutely murdering me like I have never felt before. I was strictly hiking at this point. I knew my times were out the window and making it back to my camp was my only concern.
I stopped, sat on a rock, and ate another gel while letting my heart rate return to normal. I think this did help, but after another couple minutes I was back to the sufferingest sufferfest.
At 1½ miles out from camp I was struck by a thought. My clothes were soaking wet and the wind was probably literally freezing me to death. First thought: I'll make it back to camp. Second thought: You fucking idiot! You always do this. Just take a second and put a coat on, one I was luckily carrying on my pack, and fix the situation I have just identified.
I put the coat on and continued on the trail. I am good at compartmentalizing pain. To a fault for sure as I was suffering so hard at this point and thought I'll make it the mile or so to camp and then fix my shit feeling.
Now my vision started to suck in as I tried to negotiate a stream without getting my feet wet. Figuring this out took so much thought it started to hurt. This is what caused me to have the brilliant thought that what I was experiencing was something serious. I remembered the gummies in my pack so I pulled them out of the pack as I played myself down next to the trail to avoid the inevitable fall that was about to occur.
This is where I started the story. The gummies I pulled out of my pack as I went to the ground ended up having the sugar my brain wasn't just craving, but it was in such dire need and had no way of explaining to the idiot at the controls what it was requesting. I was within eye shot of the trailhead and a mile walk down the road to camp.
The last mile was miserable but slightly better than the few prior. I passed a half dozen cars, but I'm not one to make a scene and plus I knew this mile was punishment for not doing what I know I should have done. Watch the clock, and take in calories. Its soooo fucking simple.
I feel like a kid out playing. I'm just having so much fun that I don't think about the essentials. I have not thought about this in years, but I remember as a youth playing football or hockey and some kid peeing themselves because they were so wrapped up in playing that they didn't notice their bodies cues that it had to go. Luckily I didn't piss myself as I was dehydrating myself. There's a good life hack!
Long story short, I survived, now I just need to learn. Anyone wanna take bets on that prospect?